As a dominant I make it explicitly clear to my partners that they should use their safe word the MOMENT they want things to end. But is there a time when the dominant should use the safe word because they are uncomfortable? There have been times when I feel uneasy or think I’m going too far but they seem to be enjoying it. How do you view the dominant’s role within the scope of the safeword discussion?

instructor144:

theruleset:

Simple. Safewords are a two way street.

The director can call cut whenever they need to.

Absolutely freaking THIS. I’ve pulled the plug – safeworded, in effect – more than once. The thing about an intense scene is that, beyond a certain point, a submissive can slip so far into subspace that she is no longer capable of knowing if things are going too far. She has, in effect, lost the POWER OF VOLITION. When that happens, the Dominant, as the “responsible adult” in the room, has to rein back his ache to keep hurting, keep pushing, keep going, and simply declare “This is done. Get under the covers, I’m going to get you a wet towel and a bottle of water.” It’s called being responsible.